Trained staff members |
The Lobby office. |
Greetings, and welcome to the Hotel De Feedlote, your premier pre embarkation resort for the discerning ovine. We trust your short stay with us will be pleasurable as we endeavour to meet your every whim and desire prior to your ocean cruise. Should anything not be to your satisfaction, please do not hesitate to make one of our many grounds staff aware of your concerns, and they will only be too happy to assist.
Please exit your taxi in an orderly fashion |
Upon arriving at the Hotel de Feedlote, you will notice our extensive lobby area. It is here we will process and store your paperwork and assess whether we feel you will be suited to our resort. While we welcome all guests, at times we are required to isolate guests who we feel are not up to the rigours of ocean cruising. Please do not be offended by this, as we are only concerned for your well being, and it would be negligent of us to allow you on board the liner
Our lobby area is well watered, keeping the annoyance of dust to a minimum, for both yours and our grounds staffs comfort. Should you be delayed from moving to your allocated rooms, drinks and light snacks are available while you wait.
Kitchen delivery |
Preparing the service trolley |
Your rooms are made up ready for you, with fresh drinks and selection of the finest hay and pellets we have to offer. The pellets are an acquired taste, but we guarantee once acquired, you will be chasing the service trolley looking for more. You will be pleased to know this cuisine is the same as aboard the liner, so you will be well accustomed to the fine dining on board.
Quick & painless manicure |
Hairdressers. Dont' ask for The Rachel |
Bar staff cleaning drinks dispenser |
Dinner service |
A day before your departure to the wharf for embarkation on your cruise, two separate medical staff will check to see if you are still up to the trip. Some guests find that our services do not meet their requirements, or despite our best efforts, refuse to eat our cuisine. Should the medical staff deem you unfit for the voyage, we will have no choice but to delay your travels. Again, this is for your own benefit, and there is a very good chance you can go on the next voyage.
Complimentry transfer. Bon voyage. |
We trust your stay will be pleasant. Please tell your friends and family and we look forward to assisting them in the near future.
Kind Regards
Management
Hotel De Feedlote.
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4 comments:
Great read Micheal, it shows what really happens on ground with your funny twist added.
Keep making us all laugh, as you know I'm a huge fan of Ned the kelpie.
Cheers Tahn
This is absolutely fabulous!!
Do I see shade/shelter/windbreaks as required by the ASEL? No? If not why not?
That would be the trees in the background, though I doubt that makes you any happier. But thanks for your concern.
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