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Tuesday, 8 November 2011

You Know You're a Farmer When.....

These were posted on the WA Country Hour Facebook page. The original author is unknown, but whoever they are, they're a genius.

• Your dog rides in the farm ute more than your wife.

• You convince your wife that an overnight trip for machinery parts is a vacation.

 • You wear specific hats for farm sales, livestock auctions and holidays.

 • Your best dog rides in the front of the ute with you.

• If you see a bit of string in a paddock you pick it up and put it in your pocket.

 • You’ve had to wash off with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.

 • Your ideal holiday is to visit other peoples farms and stop at every machinery dealer on the way.

 • Your hands look like they are made from the same material as your boots.

 • You've never thrown away a 5 gallon bucket.

 • You have used baling string or wire to attach a license plate & many other things.

 • You have used a chain saw to remodel your house or garden.

 • You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on the farm from 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday.

 • You have fibbed to a mechanic about how often you greased a piece of equipment.

 • You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops.

 • You have buried a dog and cried.

 • You have used a front-end loader as scaffolding for roof repairs.

 • You wave at every vehicle whether you know them or not.

 • You always look when a vehicle passes your house, even at night.

 • You fall asleep within 3 minutes of sitting in front of the tv.

 • You have used something other than paper as a toilet tissue.

 • You refer to farms by who owned them 50 or more years ago.

 • You give directions to your farm by using area landmarks, not road numbers.

 • Your wife agrees to observe Mothers' Day after the crops are planted.

 • Over 50% of your clothing came from feed or seed dealers.

 • Family weddings and special events are planned around sowing and harvest.

 • The rusted out areas of your truck are sealed off with old T-shirts.

 • Your family instantly becomes silent when the weather comes on the news.

 • The meaning of true love is that you'll ride in the tractor with him.

 • Your early morning prayer always includes rain.

 • You can't drive along a road anywhere in Australia without studying everyone else's crop's and livestock.

 • Your 4 wheel drive actually goes off road.

 • You listen to the ABC country hour and watch landline on Sundays.

 • Your other vehicle is a John Deere.

 • Getting up at 7am is a lie-in.

 • The faint (but agreeable) smell of diesel never leaves you.

 • And finally, if given $1,000,000 you would keep right on farming. You'd farm differently, but you'd keep farming because that is who and what you are.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That is brilliant. Enjoyed the read while I was having my morning coffee. :)